A Lost Mentor

It's easy to take something for granted when you don't know how special or rare the thing you have is. If you assume it's something a lot of people have then it can be lost on you just what you have. For me it was having a mentor, something I assumed lots of people found once they picked their career path. Even more so, it was something that seemed to develop naturally making it even more special.

This week I found out my first professional mentor Ric Mason passed away. Ric wasn't my first radio boss, but he was really the one that gave me my start. After working my way up from intern to board op I still couldn't get an on air shift until Ric came along. If it wasn't for him then I wouldn't have gotten on WAZY, wouldn't have made it full time and have moved across the country two different times for radio jobs. Sometimes to make something happen you just need that first break and if wasn't for Ric my career would take a drastically different turn.

It's easy to point out giving me my first job, but what made Ric a mentor was so much more than that. When I had a boss that didn't like me he stood up for me, even at personal sacrifice so I could continue my budding career. Ric regularly recommended me for opportunities, like hosting the sports tailgate show, teaching me about music, helping with the podcast I ran with my family several years and encouraging my writing. I've always been a creative spirit, but he helped foster it so it could grow. Recently, I realized a goal of mine was to write a book, but everything in written form that has come from me is in no thanks to his encouragement.

Doing what he did for my work life already qualified him as a mentor, but it's what he did in my personal life that solidified his role as mentor to me. Ric challenged my way of thinking, he was there for me through family and friend issues. While I was dealing with personal issues, ones that had me go to therapy, Ric was just as much a factor in me making it through. More importantly, he helped strengthen my mind so that I wouldn't find myself succumbing to torment I could no longer deal with. He helped me talk through things, but also figure out how to be calm and deal with issues that may arise in the future.

Ric became a surrogate family member, even letting me crash at his place when I was in need. He was selfless in looking out for me and always trying to help me at work and outside of it. He was an entirely different kind of person, but one that had reached the point where he felt like he could give back. Even at that point in his life and career it is still easy to be looking out for yourself to sustain his own personal level of success, but he was willing to prop me up and push me forward. Perhaps the highest compliment I can give him is that he took pride in seeing those he cared about grow and succeed.

One thing he told me when it came to work was 'Make yourself invaluable.' It means to work so hard your bosses never have to question if they need you when it comes to the future of the workplace. I still use that saying to this day. There was a time when my work ethic got me in trouble at early jobs, but painting that clearly has been something I never forgot and why I'm always striving to learn and do more at the places I have worked. It is tied to the believe, sometimes naïve, that the harder you work the more rewards you should face. Even if that isn't true all the time, making yourself invaluable is something that can't be questioned.

For all those things he did, the most important was just being someone I could count on. Ric was someone that no matter what was going on he had an ear for me. It helped me succeed at work, foster my creative side and made me a better person. Ric made me a better person because he was able to get me to see myself and become self-reflective. He was able to communicate in a way that wasn't accusative or defensive, it allowed me to ask the questions that needed to be and arrive at the right conclusions.

I cannot express how thankful I am that Ric also introduced me to a good friend of his, Erik Wake, who also became a mentor of mine. Not only did he do all those things for me, he gave me someone else I could count on that has looked out for me as well. That became even more important when I didn't work with Ric anymore, and especially when I moved away from home. It just meant I had two voices behind me while I was trying to find my way. Still to this day, Erik is such an important person I still talk to, and both Ric and Erik also looked out for my brother while he worked his way through college.

I wish I could say it was always that way, that Ric and I stayed close until his last moments on this planet, but unfortunately the story doesn't end that way. Much like a parent, I think it was tough to deal with the coop being flown. My brother and I moved from home within a month of each other and I was striking out on my own. I think in that role you got so used to holding on to what you had that it's tough to let it go and unfortunately it can be met with some level of revolt.

I was still young and at that age you go through phases of feeling like you have it all figured out. You want to strike out on your own and take control of everything, and that means you don't want to feel constricted. I think more often than not you realize those you revolt against were just trying to help you and probably have regrets, I know I did. The steady hand I was guided with felt more liked a closed fist and trying to help me with my life felt more like meddling. It's also easier to give advice then it is to take your own, and that's tough to watch. For someone who's supposed to guide you, it can provide an excuse to be doubtful.

As much as I need to be thankful, I also need to apologize. I need to apologize for not being more grateful and appreciative of everything Ric did for me in the moment and afterwards. I need to apologize as well for not being there when he needed me. I now will not get to the chance to tell him the way it needed to be done, but I can in a method he'd appreciate, writing. I also can show him how thankful and appreciative I am of him by taking the things he did and taught me and applying them in my own life.

Ric Mason was a friend, a boss, an inspiration and my first mentor. I'm glad he is no longer suffering, but he will be missed and the world lost someone who did a lot to help other people when he didn't have to. Fredric Hendricks will be missed and I will never be able to put into words how thankful I am, or just how much of an impact he had in my life. Whether they're a mentor or a friend, never let them doubt what they mean to you.